Do you have more than 1 big project sitting on the shelf gathering dust – but weighing you down mentally?
Do you ever miss important deadlines that end up costing you dearly?
Do you have a seemingly endless to-do list?
If so, you might be calling it procrastination, but there’s another label for you to consider – The Visibility Wound™.
Do You Have a Visibility Wound?
Take the Quiz Now
What IS The Visibility Wound™?
The Visibility Wound™, in a nutshell, is the conflicting impulses that so many of us entrepreneurs, leaders and creative types feel to both be seen and to hide.
When we crave being seen, we dream of accomplishing some of the following:
- Publish a bestselling book (or several)
- Host a top-rated podcast or Youtube channel
- Develop a sizable online following
- Launch a wildly successful product or initiative
- Land major media
- Become widely recognized as an expert in our field
- Speak in front of large audiences
- Receive credit for major changes or initiatives within an organization
But when being seen becomes too scary (almost always on an unconscious level), we create hiding places to retreat into, and then mask them by labeling our behavior “procrastination”:
- We stop communicating with our loyal customers & followers
- Inspiration disappears
- We develop writer’s block or debilitating stage fright
- We create obstacles that shift the lack of productivity onto someone or something else – “The software isn’t working so the video series will be delayed.”
- We make a “silly” mistake – or miss a deadline – that puts us out of the running for a promotion, a big sale, or some other opportunity
- We get sick or even injured, in a way that stalls our career or causes us to miss out on a big opportunity
- We develop anxiety, depression or other mental health disorders (sometimes depression isn’t so much the hiding place itself, as it is the misery of wanting to be seen yet never quite succeeding)
- We create chaos in our personal lives, as a distraction from our work or an excuse for why we’re not succeeding
Not All Productivity Issues Are Symptoms Of The Visibility Wound™
Like with all 6 of the Primary Sales Wounds™, almost everyone experiences some of these symptoms from time to time and it doesn’t mean that you’re necessarily suffering from a wound.
For example, a Visibility Wound™ flare-up is different than a simple slow-down of productivity.
We can’t always be moving through the world at full throttle, as much as we sometimes wish we could! Sometimes a slowdown is required – and having the wisdom to consciously shift gears is very different than a Visibility Wound™ flare-up.
For more about how a slow-down in productivity is different than a Visibility Wound™ flare-up, read Is Constant Striving Really the Best Way to Be Productive?
If, however, any of your Visibility symptoms are debilitating or long-lasting – or if they’re a reaction to an equal and opposite desire to be seen – that’s when you know you’ve got a full-blown Visibility Wound™ that requires attention.
Take the Visibility Wound Quiz now
My Own Struggle with the Visibility Wound™
I myself suffered from a debilitating case of the Visibility Wound™ for 8 long years.
In my case, my Visibility Wound showed up as huge spikes in productivity or accomplishment that flat-out terrified me, sending me into deep prolonged periods of hiding afterward. These periods of hiding were accompanied by deep depression, sometimes even suicidal depression.
And naturally I wouldn’t accomplish anything during these periods of profound hiding. This would only result in amplifying the underlying feeling of, “See? I’m not good enough! I’m a failure!”
In short, while I’ve published a bestselling book, spoken to audiences around the world, and have lots and lots and lots of clients and colleagues who tell me how amazing and transformative my work is, I’ve still spent a huge amount of time feeling so unworthy, that I’ve needed to hide in pretty profound ways:
- I’ve sometimes gone months … not sending a single email to my list
- I’ve sometimes gone months … not signing up a single new client
- I’ve sometimes gone months … barely able to get off the couch, the depression was so bad
This snippet of conversation between myself and an audience member at a recent workshop illustrates this apparent paradox beautifully:
Me: Tell me your name again?
Audience member: Hi, I’m Jackie. You’re so confident and putting yourself out there with picture after picture, all the enthusiasm – how do you get yourself to do it and not get sick of yourself? The fact that you can be so authentic, and honest, and out there is just pretty amazing.
Me: I do get sick of myself! This is my point. If you studied my Facebook wall, you’d find there were week-long gaps where I published nothing at all. And I guarantee you that any of those gaps was a week I was holed up under my covers eating Ben & Jerry’s, thinking “I’m so awful, I’ve got nothing to say!”
Audience member: So what you’re saying is you beat yourself up, but then you get over it.
Me: Yes, that’s pretty much it!
For more examples of the Visibility Wound™ in practice, watch this live conversation with me, Christina Morassi, Donna Crovatta and several other guests as we discuss the different ways that a Visibility Wound™ can show up.
And if you’re interested in a more detailed description of my own struggle with the Visibility Wound™ please click here.
Healing the Visibility Wound™
Let me start off by saying that the Visibility Wound™ is fundamentally caused by a lack of self-esteem, self-love and self-confidence.
“I’m not worthy.”
“I’m not good enough.”
“Nobody likes me.”
“I’m not OK.”
“If I expose myself for who I really am & what I really believe, I’ll be attacked or even destroyed.”
It doesn’t take a degree in psychology to understand that beliefs like these are extremely deep-rooted in the psyche, going back to experiences you first had as a toddler.
As such, completely healing your Visibility Wound™ can require a long and difficult journey of personal development & spiritual growth.
But if you’re at a point in your journey where you’re ready to begin to heal this Wound, you will find that the steps I outline below can help you the next time you’re suffering a Visibility Wound™ flare-up.
Click Here for the 3-Step Process to Heal Your Visibility Wound™
For help healing your Visibility Wound, consider hiring me for private coaching. I offer packages starting as low as $2,500, or up to $20,000.
To start the conversation, email my assistant Rosie@JuliaKline.com. She'll send you my coaching brochure, describing all that I offer.